The Lex Files

Patrick Murphy For President

I join with Bleeding Green Nation in endorsing Rep. Patrick Murphy (D-PA) for President. Why? Here’s the reason.

On Wednesday, the House passed a resolution congratulating the New York Giants on winning this year’s Super Bowl “and completing one of the most remarkable postseason runs in professional sports history.” The resolution passed by a vote of 412 to 1. Murphy, a diehard Eagles fan who worked at Veterans Stadium as a security guard when he was 16, was the only House member to vote against it. “As a former 700-level security guard and lifelong Eagles fan, I couldn’t, in good conscience, vote for the New York Giants,” Murphy said Thursday. “The only thing worse would have been a resolution honoring the Dallas Cowboys.”

The New York Giants.

For the past few hours, I was a BIG, HUGE, New York Giants fan.

This post is to officially acknowledge that I now once again hate the Giants with a passion.

My Patriots hatred remains unchanged.

Football

It’s hard for an Eagles fan like me right now. My team had a better record than multiple teams that actually, y’know, made the playoffs.

Yesterday, two division rivals (that means “bitter enemies who should die in a fire,” if you’re not hip to the lingo) of ours played against each other: The Giants vs. the Cowboys. In general, my ultimate desire would be to see both of those teams lose. Miserably.

But if one of them had to win, I’m happy at the end of the day that it involved the Cowboys losing.

I love Doritos!

Doritos is having a contest: They’re soliciting 30-second commercials, a few of which will win cash prizes, and one of which will air during the Superbowl.

You can enter 10 times.

Please watch my first entry, which features an original Doritos jingle (written by me, of course), and a cast of two Friedmans and two Krutzels.

If you are so moved by my Doritos commercial that you feel you must do something, go ahead and register on the site and click to indicate that you “love” my video.

Enjoy!

Where will it stop?

I’m back from the honeymoon, John Ritter’s dead, the Philadelphia Eagles can’t win, the recall election’s been postponed, my shiny new TiVo recorded hours of entertainment for me while I was gone, by dog gained a pound and can finally roll over on command, I rode a dolphin, I swam on a horse, I…

…I don’t have time for this right now.

I have many stories. You hopefully have some patience. Bear with me.

January 27th, 2003

I, for one, am flabbergasted that the Eagles didn’t win.

Soup or Bowl?

I suppose I’ll deign to watch the SuperBowl today. Not that anyone good is playing. And I have a feeling that a lot of ads will be mildly subpar. I, for one, don’t care about movie previews for T3, The Matrix, or Other Random Crapola Movies where the writing is given second billing to the special effects.

Now, in a movie like Jurassic Park or Shrek, the special effects can feel free to upstage the writing. But in The Matrix? No. Note that this is only because The Matrix, contrary to popular (read: brainwashed) opinion, is actually not a good movie. Trust me on this.

October 29th, 2002

I would never post a celebratory message about the Eagles kicking butt before on Monday Night Football before the game ended, because that would just be stupid. But man, if I would make such a post pre-emptively, now would be the time.

No cigar

Man, the Eagles were close. And they played a good game. And they were almost in the Superbowl.


Cool.


I’m rooting for a 0-0 tie on next Sunday, because I despise both teams equally (though with much hatred).


I’m trying a new web browser, Opera. It does everything well so far, except for displaying the page with which I submit posts to this very blog. How annoying.


I hate Sundays. Too much rehearsal, not enough time for football, videogames, and eating.